(by Niyaso Carter)
Deep and ecstatic sex touches us like few other things do. It takes us out of our normal, controlled way of being. It opens our breath, senses, feelings, and our heart too. This can be so lovely and beautiful, but also disturbing or exposing. When we truly make love, when we surrender deeply to our instinctual selves, to our body’s senses, to our aliveness and to our hearts, feelings come up. They must come up, because it is our heart opening in trust that makes for truly great sex. If you want sex that is sacred, if you want to make love in a way that’s divine, you need to understand what impact emotions and feelings have on your lovemaking.
As you probably have experienced first hand at one time or another, emotions can make or break great sex. No amount of sexual know-how or Tantric technique or special energy exercise will have true meaning without allowing our feelings to play their role in sacred lovemaking. Fully opening into divine sex is all about trust. Without it any knowledge or technique is in danger of remaining rote and mechanical. A lot of times, the reason people don’t have deep and fulfilling sex is because they don’t trust this emotional movement. Yet the more we open sexually, the more the shadow side of ourselves will come up also – that is, the unlived, unresolved and unhealed parts of us. This is particularly dramatic in the case of trauma survivors, but it’s true to some degree for almost everybody.
to be continued in next post