Western culture lacks a healthy role model for good intimacy and sex. If you were lucky enough to have been raised by parents who truly loved each other and had a good sex life as well, that may have helped. But even then, you didn’t get to observe how they interacted in their most private intimacy. And most likely, due to cultural taboos, they didn’t talk to you about it very much. Or, if they did want to talk to you about it, often by that time teens are so affected by peers and culture and too embarrassed to let them talk about it.
Anyhow most of us didn’t have very enlightened parents and so didn’t have much input from anyone but our screwy culture.
In today’s civilized world the most common role modeling for love and sex that most of us get is from the steamy romantic scenes in movies. And for the most part, the only instruction is either from magazines or from peers who read those magazines. This is not the healthiest pathway, yet most of us, including our children follow it. What else is there?
On top of that, for many men, their sex role model is pornography. Unfortunately, magazines and movies are not first and foremost interested in providing information on healthy sex and lovemaking; it’s not the film producers and magazine editors job to care how fleeting, misleading or meaningful the pleasures they’re advocating are; their job is to make good sales, of course. I don’t think I need to say much about why porn doesn’t offer great role models.
With my work I hope to provide a saner picture, one that really works, one that leads to love and an overall happy life.